Since I have gotten married I have been fortunate enough to have traveled to different cities, countries, and continents. Although I have loved them all, I must confess I felt safer on several of our foreign trips as they were taken with my husband’s maternal family and friends in what, to me, comprised a rather large group. As I have previously stated, this was our fourth trip to Paris (actually my fourth, my husband’s fifth, and our daughter’s third) and I have always felt as if Paris were my home. It has never felt “foreign” or different, and I have never felt unsafe. I have gotten pretty much accosted in the dark, dank alleys of Venice and I was ignored as a woman wandering the narrow, winding streets in Tangiers. I have roamed over the ankle-turning, uneven cobblestone streets in Guatemala amidst abject poverty and yet never felt threatened. And I have traveled along the coastal cities of Spain without any qualms. For me being lost could be terrifying, or it could mean becoming happily immersed in a place with no plan or direction. Once on the basin of a glacier in Alaska I felt lost due to “white blindness” and it was absolutely paralyzing. It was like being in a pitch dark room only everything was white — I could not discern the sky from the ground and it made me feel incredibly disoriented as well as claustrophobic. Milling about the streets of London never made me unsettled; it just didn’t feel like home. Ah, but my beloved Paris; I have no words. After the zoo my husband and I decided to spend a leisurely evening revisiting some of our favorite haunts. Despite this being our little girl’s third trip, she was only five and a half years old, and she kept exclaiming with unbridled glee at every turn. I realized THIS was really the first trip for her, and I pray she will always remember some of it. For me, my little picture sums up the simplest and yet most treasured pleasures to be found in Paris. We ascended all three elevators to the top of the Eiffel Tower. Our little one held no fear at the steep climb, nor was she daunted by the throngs of people speaking every language imaginable around her. A sweet young Muslim family shared their little girl’s snacks with her and the French TRULY thought she was one of their own with her deep, brown Gallic eyes, bow, and toile dress. Afterward we rode the carousels, much to all of our delight. She had done so twice in the past, but only her father and I remembered. There are always many African vendors selling their wares underneath the tower. The vast difference on this trip was that the French police had the entire perimeter of the Eiffel Tower gated. So there was no more carefree traversing back and forth. Still, she got this pink Eiffel Tower and we all treated our selves to some glacé au chocolat. And no one, but no one, does chocolate and/or ice cream like the French. My husband and I reminded ourselves how nice it was to have a small serving so we could indulge our taste buds rather than our waist lines. We were never lost, but we did lose ourselves relaxing in the heart of Paris next to the Seine. The famous American essayist Henry David Thoreau once said, “Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves.” I started to understand parts of myself I had never fully realized until my first trip to my beloved France. I saw my husband starting to really lose himself on this trip in her language, history, art, and culture. And our little one — the greatest joy of our lives — well, she was truly lost in Paris.
Monthly Archives: April 2018
Charming Gardners
In Dallas while waiting in the Admiral’s Club for our flight to take off we met a delightful man who was taking his granddaughter to Paris for the week. He was going for both business and pleasure and kept an apartment there. We struck up a conversation with him, and our girls instantly became friends in the sweet way little girls seem to do. We were surprised to see the two of them waiting patiently for us to disembark once we’d landed. They wanted to invite us over to visit and then get out and do something together while we were all in Paris. I must confess Burk and I are not spontaneous at all; to the contrary we are planners to the nth degree. I realize that is not necessarily a good thing — it’s just how we are. This precious man and his sweet granddaughter had offered us an unprecedented kink in our carefully laid plans. Thankfully — for once — we decided to deviate. And so, veering from our itinerary, we made our way to their apartment which was situated in a small, quiet courtyard in a lovely arrondissement. We climbed the narrow stairs to the second level (which the French consider to be the first floor) waiting for our new friends to appear. They welcomed us in graciously. It was a Sunday and they had gone to the American Church in Paris that morning. I found myself wishing we had attended as well; it is something we have yet to do. As we were visiting, the suggestion came that we all go to the zoo. Despite all my research, it had never occurred to me to take our little one to the ménagerie! And so we set out via the Métro, the Paris rapid transit system, which is mostly underground. Our train however would traverse a cool, clear tunnel with which I was unfamiliar that ran above the Seine. As we made our way to one of the oldest zoos in the world I would also discover the Jardin des plantes (the main botanical garden in France) was just adjacent. I recalled from a previous visit to Versailles the medicinal gardens had been transferred to Paris at the request of Marie Antionette. It was an exceptionally hot day in June but our little group traversed with perserverance. The zoo, which opened in 1794, looked extremely antiquated, but the animals were all small and were not in inhumane conditions. Unlike many of its zoological predecessors, it was not all cement and tried to incorporate the natural elements. I believe it must have been quite progressive in its day. Of course my great love lies with wolves but the enclosures were too small to have them now. I did capture this little beauty which is cousin to the wolf — the fox. We had a wonderful time and parting was a bit sad. The French novelist Marcel Proust once said, “Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” Walking around the Ménagerie and the Botanical Gardens of Paris with our new friends had definitely made our souls blossom; ironically we had already met them on our own soil — our charming gardners.
Paris — Mon Amour
We were married in June 2007 and Paris was the place I dared to request, holding my breath, after my impossibly handsome husband-to-be asked where I would like to spend our honeymoon. I have always been a hopeless, incurable romantic. Once I even took a test and scored a 100 on a scale for romance. It did not particularly surprise me, as I had teethed myself on historical romance novels from at least the age of 10. I could not have known how I would love Paris so. We were also fortunate enough to have gone to Venice. What could possibly be a more romantic honeymoon?! But I would immediately discover my heart was with France. On the occasion of our tenth wedding anniversary this past summer; our fourth trip to Paris together, I had the unmitigated pleasure of watching my beloved fall in love with her just as he would with another woman — only I held no jealousy. To the contrary, I was thrilled and my heart was bursting with joy. I had known the language but saw how eager my beloved was to know it as well. I watched him view the city with the same dawning endearment which I had learned within myself a decade earlier. This was not someone merely obliging another on a trip; this was the great love of my life whom I saw truly delighting in the city I love with every fiber of my soul. It is something which cannnot adequately be put into words. We both love history, but that could have been Rome. Yet with each trip I watched him increasingly absorbing and learning the history and culture that was my greatest passion. I adore Mexico, and Mariachi music remains my favorite … but Paris is a special lady which stands on her own. This would mark the beginning of ten glorious days in the most romantic city in the world: Paris — mon amour.
Cast Off
As mothers go, I truly do not feel I am obnoxious. I am, however, very proudly verbal. I took this picture immediately after our six-year-old had her cast removed from breaking her elbow awhile back. They literally used pliers to remove the stainless steel L-shaped pins that were embedded inside her bones — without so much as a minimal pain dimmer. It involved a bit of digging and there was an awful wrenching sound as the rather long pins were slowly twisted and pulled from her small frame. She never cried and she actually watched them being removed without even a flinch. The doctors there said they have seen big professional football players take one look at their surgeries after their casts were removed and have thrown up. Not my girl! She asked what they were doing every step of the way and, despite being pale, refused to look away. After her pins were out she said she wanted to keep them, so the physician’s assistant helpfully cleaned them and then sealed them in a clear medical bag. She couldn’t wait to bring them to show and tell. On the way out she privately lamented her pins’ sterility; she would have preferred to have retained the blood and tissue that came out along with them. Even having had her hard cast sawed off and her pins removed, you will note she is still in a sling here. It would be over a month before her doctor would give her clearance to resume her twice a day recesses with her classmates as well as her physical education classes, all of which she had missed for months. Austin O’Malley, who was a professor of English at Notre Dame as well as an ophthalmologist once said, “When walking through the ‘valley of shadows,’ remember, a shadow is cast by a Light.” I think it became more difficult for her not to move fully once all her procedures were over. Even her P.E. coach said she was “a good sport” about her confinement, although he could see her frustration. I suspect this serves as a classic lesson that one does not fully appreciate what one has until it is lost. After she was officially released I believe she has given more thought and gratefulness for physical activity, and she is thankful to be cast off.
Through A Child’s Eyes
As a child my happiest memories were of Sundays. It was the one day my father did not work and I loved seeing him in his suits at church. I also loved hearing my mother sing and can remember going down for the children’s sermon before I was old enough to serve as an acolyte. We always went to the cafeteria afterwards. Sundays served as the framework of my life; they were never forced and always happy. I loved the church’s stained glass, the hymns, and being with my family. Mama and Daddy always held hands and I remember thinking what a striking couple they made: my mother with her beautiful red hair and light brown eyes and my father with his thick black hair and striking dark blue eyes. I often studied the contrast in their clasped hands. My father’s were huge and red while my mother’s were tiny and white. Now that I am a mother, I want the same security and structure for my child. My husband and I always enjoy holding hands just as my folks did. I have seen our little one taking note of that and giving a happy little smile. Recently our church started a children’s sermon. I have no idea whether or not Episcopalians have traditionally done that or if it is something new; I was reared Methodist. And yes I slid down “our” pew to shamelessly snap this photo of our little one answering a question concerning the Anglican “Mothering Sunday.” Our Marian child replied that the Virgin Mary was the Mother of the Church. I was proud she was listening and responding with enthusiasm. My great love of the Church is the reason I wrote and published my first book on Christian Symbols at age of eleven. I confess I do hope that the same love of Christian liturgy, music, and Scripture will seep into her soul at a very early age the way it did mine. That does mean to suggest in any way an intolerance toward others; rather I pray it should serve to strengthen her own compassion and beliefs. In the New International Version of the Bible Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” Those are powerful words, particularly for having come from Christ himself. As adults it is all too easy to lose whatever childlike faith we may have had. For me, “childlike” does not suggest ignorance; rather it implies an inherent wisdom and trust that defies logical convention. I hope I shall be made better for striving to see my faith and the world through a child’s eyes.