Ah, kittens.  I had forgotten how mischievous they can be.  Our little boy Blue is finding the confines of his nursery (our bathroom) not to his liking and wants to get out and stomp with the big dogs (or wolfies, in our case).  I know he would be fine but I would rather be safe than sorry.  He could get stuck or hide and frankly Mama’s just too tired for that.  So I can sleep soundly knowing he is safe in the bathroom while he is still so tiny.  Apparently he had a party last night.  I woke up to an entire roll of unravelled toilet paper, strewn about all over the place, with him looking up at me like an angel.  The American essayist Agnes Repplier once wrote:

“A kitten is chiefly remarkable for rushing about like mad at nothing whatever, and generally stopping before it gets there.”

And he most certainly is running madly about, wanting to explore and discover.  When I was in junior high I always wished I had a house so that it could get toilet papered.  I thought the rolls billowing in the wind looped magically around the trees had a certain grace to it.  I have gotten to experience a lot since having a house, but I never thought our first toilet papering would be an inside job.

Today is a tough day about which to write.  I realize for many this is a day of celebration for the Day of the Dead.  And I think it is wonderful to remember those who have passed on before us.  It is lovely to have a special day to bring their memory to life tangibly by having their favorite food or by doing something that honors them and keeps them alive for the next generation.  But I confess I just feel an overwhelming sense of sadness and loss.  I think of my parents every day and talk about them daily as well.  I love that in our church the departed are always prayed for and remembered; I find great comfort in that.  This was the last professional picture we had made (for a church directory) before my daddy passed.  When I took this picture today it actually pained me to see that on Daddy’s side it seemed more faint.  It is as if my memories of him are tangibly fading as well.  He passed when I was just 28 years old.  Only people in a family of three can understand the incredible bond which exists between them.  Three is a magic number.  As I strive to stay positive, something which my father strongly believed one should always do, I shall attempt to think of things they did that made me laugh.  Every time we would go to Petsmart Daddy would always ask if he could take home a couple of their free dog biscuits.  After the cashier replied “sure” he would say, “Thank you!  My wife loves these!” and the poor teenager’s eyes would get as wide as saucers.  Pretty soon they knew his schtick.  One time before church Mama caught Daddy with a bunch of doughnut holes and tried to get him not to eat them because she was worried about his diet.  I’ll never forget they wound up oozing out of his huge red fingers as her tiny white ones tried to make him let them go.  They were together 44 years and they showed me what lasting love looks like.  How I miss them.  If I could have one wish it would be to bring them back for just one day so they could see their granddaughter and meet my husband.  I hope and pray fervently they somehow know and can see us.  And I hope beyond measure that I make them proud.  The English Anglican priest William Inge once wrote:

“Love remembered and consecrated by grief belongs, more clearly than the happy intercourse of friends, to the eternal world; it has proved itself stronger than death.”

Today is a day I always liked as a kid but have learned to love as an adult.  I never got to trick-or-treat because living in an apartment is a little different when neighbors move more often and you do not know people as well.  Plus I grew up in the ’70’s and there were all these scares on the news about razor blades in apples.  I do have fond memories of my folks taking me to a rec center for a Halloween carnival each year, though.  You could play games to win treats and they had a haunted house.  It was fun but nothing like the rare magic of seeing everyone out strolling the neighborhood at night all dressed up and scoring free candy.  People invite you into their homes sometimes and it’s fun to see how someone else decorates or what the inside of their house looks like.  I think it’s even better than Christmas caroling.  Ironically, people aren’t suspicious of the Grim Reaper knocking at their door and, I’m not gonna lie, I love scaring the SPIT out of kids with our doormat that makes different terrifying sounds.  In so many ways I feel my life has just begun and I cherish relishing in the new joys and discoveries it has in store.  The American poet Emily Dickinson once said, “Find ecstasy in life; the mere sense of living is joy enough.”  Ecstasy tonight looked like a 46 year old woman with long, dark blue hair sipping from her newly discovered wine, “Once Upon a Vine:  The Big Bad Red Blend” while watching her handsome husband dressed as a ship’s captain escort his Little Mermaid princess around to collect treats.  Oh, if I could just bottle it.

Every member of our furry family has a story.  When we lost our beloved cat Sweetie we vowed we were not getting another because we already have a zoo.  Months of sadness and empty loneliness went by.  Then I came across a Facebook friend’s post showing a picture of this “Blue Point Siamese” and other animals living in unspeakable conditions.  God bless animal rescuers who selflessly help defenseless cats, dogs, and wildlife.  Hesitantly, I showed my husband the picture and asked if we could just see him.  I think you can guess how this story progresses.  So now my husband and little girl are getting to witness the joys of a Siamese cat for the first time.  I TOLD them they were incredibly smart and very chatty.  He hasn’t stopped meowing or purring since we’ve gotten him and he has already escaped the confines of the bathroom, surviving next to our huge wolfies.  Dakota’s head alone is at least five times the size of this little kitten’s body.  They have also learned first hand the meaning of the term “high as a cat’s back.”  The little guy is fearless but still never hisses.  He is a mix of strong and sweet; a perfect fit for our family.  We all are in love; his name is Blue.

It seems as if the word “candid” is used as a negative a lot.  However, I would consider myself to be a candid person.  The word itself is defined as frank; outspoken; open and sincere; free from reservation, disguise or subterfuge; straightforward.  My handsome husband and I were attending a family dinner and when I glanced over I noticed Burk’s Aunt was trying to get a picture of us.  It got me thinking about how much of our lives are really candid.  In an age of posed selfies, I vastly prefer life’s moments caught unaware.  We were at the Petroleum Club attending a Murchison family rehearsal dinner and it was lovely.  It was packed and this picture was taken from a distance.  Rarely do we have pictures of us together and I am really glad she took this and sent it to me.  The American writer Connor Franta said:

“It always surprises me how much my followers appreciate how candid my photos are – they may not have a particularly unique subject, but it’s more about the light you shed on the subject than the subject itself.”

I love this quote.  Looking at this candid picture of us I would like to think it says we are a happy couple that loves each other and looks out for one another.  Vainly, I would like to think it says, “Hey, they’re a great looking couple.”  Whatever the light that was shed on us here I am happy to have the memory … candid.

We were at the doctor’s for my little one’s annual wellness visit.  Thankfully, the plethora of vaccines were over and it was more of a check up.  I found myself thinking how ironic it was she was proud she’d gotten bigger all while I am striving to be smaller.  Not that I would ever tell her that.  I want her to have a positive body image and I suspect she is going to have my build.  I am proud of that and would not want to change it for the world.  Instead of taking off a onesie down to a diaper she was given a modesty “gown” which opened in the back.  It sort of freaked me out realizing how fast we had already reached this point.  She has always asked to see books, but I have read them aloud to her.  This time she asked if she could try to read.  I was shocked when she laboriously but triumphantly made it through an entire page!  I could not believe it.  I LIVE to read and I knew this marked the beginning of a whole new world for her for the rest of her life.  The American actress Helen Hayes said:

“From your parents you learn love and laughter and how to put one foot before the other.  But when books are opened you discover that you have wings.”

I think my little one is beginning to grow wings.